I Blog therefore I Am

18 Aug

I wasn’t sure I would blog again. You miss a week here or there, and then you find it more and more difficult to get back into the game. The blogging world shifts, new faces appear and before you know it, you feel like an outsider tiptoeing on the periphary of something, uncertain whether you want back in.  A bloggy voyeur.

But the nagging feeling keeps gnawing away. Should i? Can i?

So I’m writing this post out of curiosity more than anything. Interested to see how those keys might feel under my fingers, whether the words will flow.

So much has happened these past 18 months and I’ve changed.  No longer identifying with  Marketing OR Milk, the line drawing of mother and child, nor the over-expectant tagline.

Perhaps that’s why I stopped writing.  If I don’t know who I am, who the hell am I writing for?  But hasn’t that always been the point of my writing  – to question, search, define and CHANGE?

And whoever this person might be, wherever she might be going (and believe me, at the moment she has no clue) I quite like her. She’s older, wiser, a little sad at times, and definitely prone to an embarrassing outburst or two, but perhaps still with something to say.

And as I write, the familar feeling of release takes over: Each word like a small tentative cut:  Slowly relaxing.

Shameful, playful self-harm.

18 Responses to “I Blog therefore I Am”

  1. kay wilkinson (@chaoskay) August 18, 2012 at 9:11 am #

    Hello! So nice to see you peeking back into writing again. Interesting turn of phrases you use there, and I know what you mean I think. Dabbling with the keys, forming the words, digging into thoughts, scraping the surface, something like that. I’ve always loved your posts. Welcome back, x Kay :O)

  2. Jem August 18, 2012 at 9:12 am #

    I’ve been blogging for about 10-11 years. Obviously I’ve changed a lot in that time, but one constant has been blogging. It doesn’t matter who I am, what I do or how many times I abandon it, the blog is always there. Looking at it from that perspective helps me stay loyal to my blog.

    Good luck finding yourself again 🙂

  3. @scribblingmum August 18, 2012 at 9:34 am #

    Hello you. Oh, I hear you. This is probably the first comment I’ve left on anyones blog for months. The keys feel good under your fingers though, no?

  4. Looking for Blue Sky August 18, 2012 at 10:48 am #

    Hopefully those fingers will continue their dance across the keyboard x

  5. vegemitevix August 18, 2012 at 11:00 am #

    Wonderful seeing you back. Maybe a rebrand is in order? Keep writing..you know one thing for certain, no matter who you are or who you’re changing into as a person, you’ll always be a writer – that’s not in doubt.

  6. Kelloggsville August 18, 2012 at 11:26 am #

    Hello you. There’s nothing like a template change to help you re-relate to the facade. And it is just a facade, behind every one there is a differing personal reason. I’m not sure whether I blog to just share those inevitable embarrassing outbursts that are coming more and more frequently.

  7. maijasmommymoments August 18, 2012 at 11:41 am #

    Welcome back! I hope you’ll stay a bit. Can’t wait to learn all about the person you’ve grown into over the last 18mths.

  8. Nadia August 18, 2012 at 7:28 pm #

    Welcome back my love, I’ve missed reading your posts. Always gives me something to ponder over. I’m glad you like the current version of the ever evolving you. Keep writing so I can keep reading. Xxx

  9. Julie August 18, 2012 at 8:22 pm #

    Hello….six months? Really? Wow. Nice to see you back (I hope), in whatever capacity it ends up being. X

  10. Knackered Mother August 18, 2012 at 9:44 pm #

    Hello you…lovely to read your words.

  11. jfb57 August 19, 2012 at 4:28 pm #

    Hello! 🙂 🙂 🙂

  12. Rosie Scribble August 24, 2012 at 5:54 pm #

    I’ve always loved your posts and I’m missed them. So welcome back. Hope you’ll be hanging around 🙂

  13. Kirsten Lodge August 25, 2012 at 9:05 am #

    YES!!!!! Welcome back, gorgeous woman. I have so missed your wonderful way with words… and as always, I miss you xx

  14. Mrs TeePot (@TeePotTweets) August 26, 2012 at 5:30 pm #

    Well I’m certainly glad to have you back!

  15. Doodlemum August 27, 2012 at 2:19 pm #

    Welcome back lovely, sometimes time out is a good thing. If it’s time to write again then it’s time. xxxxxxx

  16. Iota September 9, 2012 at 9:00 pm #

    Well, I’m not the only one who still has your blog in my reader, then.

  17. Simone January 23, 2013 at 8:12 am #

    HEY!!!! I had no idea you were blogging again! Right, I am adding you back into my blog roll and crossing my fingers that you’ll keep writing… (so glad you commented on my actual blog, Or I wouldn’t have realised your blog was open for business again!)

  18. Mayfair Mum April 4, 2013 at 7:52 pm #

    Yay! For some reason my reader ain’t been picking you up but just wanted to say (belatedly!) it’s good to see you writing again. Do it on your terms, that’s what it’s all about right?

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