I was on the phone the other day going through the application process for a new mobile phone when the question came
“occupation?” **silence** “occupation please?” he repeated.
It wasn’t that i hadn’t heard him, i was just wondering what to say. I finally plumped for “none”.
“Do you mean housewife?” he suggested. “Yes, yes that’s right”.
Thing was, i didn’t expect it to be on the list. I thought he’d meant a paid job.
That’s what most people mean when they say “and what do you do?”
6 months ago it would have been easy – “i work in digital marketing”. Now i’m not sure what to say.
Is that why so many stay-at-home mums seem to end up doing voluntary work, setting up their own small business franchises, or going back to college? Are we really trying to to “keep our brains active”, our “toes in the water” or are we doing it just so that we can answer that question? Feel less guilty? Because even though our work never stops, for some reason we still feel like we ought to get a “proper” job.
All i know is, i’ve somehow found myself doing a new course, and applying for voluntary work all in the space of a few months. No wonder i’m feeling pretty good about myself.
So maybe next time someone asks me what i do. i’ll reply
“**ing loads” and smile sweetly.
Marketing to Milk 
I have always hated that question too. I have never seen working in digital advertising as a profession and have always struggled that I have not been able to say ‘I am a doctor, nurse or lawyer.’ When I say I am an Account Director for a online publisher I usually get a blank face and an ‘oh, you work in finance’.
I have got used to calling myself a house wife, it does seem quite 1950’s, but heyho!
h – well now you can hold your head up high and say “i’m training to be a teacher”!
TheMadHouse – ooh i like that thought. for some reason a 1950s housewife feels more glamorous!
They need to think of a new term to accurately describe to role of a modern SAHM. Housewife just makes me think of headscarves, Avon, and ladies in aprons baking scones – none of which remotely apply to me (although I do like eating scones…) How about Managing Director of Domestic Affairs?
I broke my hand last year, and when I was being checked in to casualty there was a similar question, and a similar pause. I struggled to articulate the fact that I’m a full-time nappy-changer, bottle-washer, shopper etc. when the lady looked at her computer, smiled, and announced: ‘I’ll put that down as household management’.
It’s what I’ve said ever since!
Love it! i quite like the sound of “domestic affairs” it sounds kinda national security-esque!
Love your post, why isn’t motherhood more valued?I’d hate to answer “housewife”.Fortunately I’m a writer so that hasn’t changed for me.
In France , they use the term “at home mother”,much more appropriated.Why do they want to know anyway? what difference does it make when you go to casualty?
On a bad day I’d be tempted to say: mind your own business!
I’ve been out of paid employment for 4 years and I still stutter when someone vaguely official asks me what it is I do.
I normally say “um, nothing, I mean I look after our children and do all the house stuff, do you know what I mean?”. Concise eh?
Haha – yeah I hate that question – cause to be honest we do EVERYTHING 24-7. Awesome blog – and keep up the amazing JOB you are doing!!
I still say I’m a music pr sounds much more glamorous even though my life is feeding, feeding, and more feeding my 3 month old and trying to appease a tantruming toddler. I’m on maternity leave and being at home is the hardest job in the world!